Comments: It's Dark

WTF bou?
You got 'em.

Posted by K-nine at June 17, 2010 09:55 PM

Dealing with my father in law. It's a cess pool of emotion. Most of it negative.

Posted by Bou at June 17, 2010 09:58 PM

I'm really sorry. *sigh*

Posted by Teresa at June 17, 2010 10:31 PM

I figured it was the FIL without reading your comment.

If he can hear you (and even if you are not sure), hold his hand, tell him that you love him and are there for him. You know how much he loves you and your love for his son.

{{{{{{Hugs for each of you in your family including your FIL}}}}}}

Posted by The Thomas at June 17, 2010 10:40 PM

tell him it's okay to go. that you'll be okay. that his son and grandsons will be okay. it will help him. i did this with my dad and i know he heard me and it seemed that's what he was waiting to hear when he passed. it's hard, i won't lie to you, but he's in a better place now.

Posted by Tina at June 18, 2010 12:21 AM


Posted by Sticks at June 18, 2010 04:10 AM

Oh he can hear me. And he can yell. And have tantrums.

He's in rehab. The miracle of modern medicine and a drug called lasex. He's going to be around with a piss poor quality of life for years to come.

He's flat worn us out.

Posted by Bou at June 18, 2010 06:32 AM

Oh Bou - I'm so sorry. Keeping you and your family in my thoughts.

Posted by Kris, in New England at June 18, 2010 08:22 AM

Generally once they start going down hill, they end up going down hill fast.

Faster then you can even imagine.

Posted by Quality Weenie at June 18, 2010 10:25 AM

Wishing you strength and a bit of rest, Bou! I think what Weenie said is probably true. You said he has been pining for your MIL ...

Posted by PeggyU at June 18, 2010 10:38 AM

I understand. Sometimes there are valid reasons.

I'm sorry for the pain and the dark.

Posted by Jean at June 18, 2010 11:14 AM

Strength to you all - and maybe a decent night's sleep?

Posted by patti at June 18, 2010 12:38 PM

You could tell him that if he doesn't behave, you let his son drive him everywhere.

Posted by The Thomas at June 18, 2010 04:25 PM

Now Thomas, that is dang funny. He and I just had a HUGE discussion about how he should be driving again with his declaring he drives just like me. I think the *gasp* was nearly audible, only hidden by Mr. T's snickering behind me. Good Grief. I swear... I do not drive 5 mph nor do I stop at green lights to make sure nobody is going to run a red one. He was a menace. We are all safer with his keys in our home. Good Grief.

"I don't mean to be critical of my son, but he drives way too fast. I didn't drive like that. I drove like... you. I did. I drove just like you do." And behind me I could hear T choking...

Posted by Bou at June 18, 2010 08:10 PM

I certainly see it as an option. Not for you though. Carry on out there!!!

Posted by Curtis at June 18, 2010 09:58 PM

QW - I had to laugh when I read your comment... had to. I remember when my grandmother broke her hip. She was 88, over weight, and had congestive heart failure. She had a cardiac arrest at the hospital and they revived her.

I soooo remember my mother saying, "Well, this is it. Grandma broke her hip, she won't be able to recover from this."

Of course she not only recovered, 3 months later she was up walking again and she lived to be 99. Because why not. Heh.

I never predict. Ever. I have seen too many odd things happen. He could recover and be around for years or he could take a sudden dive or he could just linger around for a middling amount of time. One never knows. But it's very very difficult to be the family doing the care taking. No matter how it turns out.

Prayers for all of you Bou - for however much it helps.

Posted by Teresa at June 18, 2010 09:59 PM

QW may not be far off. I thought he was in rehab and would be home in a week, but tonight, my husband said his legs and feet are getting hard full of water again. He has the nurses keeping an eye on it.

It's kidneys.

I didn't go see him in rehab. I needed a break. Every time I see him, I eat ice cream or find myself at Pineras. Bagel Boyz has great chocolate chip muffins... That's not good...

Posted by Bou at June 18, 2010 10:07 PM

Bou, I soooo understand. I also know how hard it is to look at a situation and see any kind of positive in it. My sister is terrified of any kind of doctors so when my mother had surgery and was terrified about the surgery itself because she has a heart condition and we were warned of the possibilities, I went to the hospital to be there for her. I had NO IDEA what I should or shouldn't say/do and was also really worried. I discovered the answer by accident.

We are geographically so far apart that I could never give you even a hug, pat on the back, tequila shot... But I DO hope I can give you the gift of laughter because it truly helps me when I am in a very dark place and I hope it will help you if only for a little bit. So here are three Lemonade Vodka shots for you...

A Pirate, Happy Juice, And A Sharpie...

Unusual Selling Points

The Alternative To Lemonade...

Posted by Lemon Stand at June 19, 2010 07:10 PM

I sooo hear you on this one Bou. And I agree... Hope things get better soon.

Posted by Richmond at June 20, 2010 09:16 AM