Comments: Clean So Far

".. If I'm unable to communicate in any form, I'm shitting my pants, and there's little to no hope for a full recovery, pull the plug."

There's a real good cheap shot at Acidman in there somewhere, but I wouldn't take it.

posted by Anton on March 31, 2005 06:22 PM

That is not living. When the day comes, and I can't take care of myself, it will be time to check out. I do not want to rely on my family and kids to take care of me, let me go, Cat.

posted by catfish on March 31, 2005 07:28 PM

A terrible tale. No one knows where to begin these things. At least, if he lived in Florida, some unelected magistrate could take the decision out of everyones' hands. Down here you takes your justice where they shoves it.

posted by Velociman on March 31, 2005 08:09 PM

I don't think there is ever a RIGHT answer for that...just another option that seems better than the other.

God, that story is tragic. Life can be cruel, can't it?

posted by Dana on March 31, 2005 08:18 PM

My deceased wife Carrol, the love of my life, the angel who brought me to fullness of life, was diagnosed with terminal cancer in 98, we never gave up and fought till her last breath, July 5, 2000, I expended ever resource we had, every dollar, every ounce of energy, was devoted to trying to win a losing battle. We knew we would lose, but we did not quit, and sometimes I think we prolonged her life and punished her with the pain she endured. The point being, it is a very personal journey and if you've not been there, I would think it might be difficult to understand.
Every time someone dies, a wife, a husband, a child, a father or a mother, a son or daughter, there is someone left to grieve. The question is “ Do we stop living and forever grieve?” or do we continue on, and live our life, as best we can, remembering the good we have been taught, while in the presence of those who have passed? I would guess the same could be said of divorce, where one or the other was deeply in love, but I am speaking of death, because that is the final chapter in any love story. Grief is a healthy thing, but it has its place. Grief is not to over take our lives and focus us on that one aspect of life. Grief is a feeling of loss and respect, also, love and sorrow. We have lost the one we loved, the one we respected and changed our lives to abide by their wishes and to gain their respect in return. We loved them so and are so sorry we did not convey the amount of love and respect we had for them. We all live, and we all love. Do we take every day and tell those we love ,how much we love them or do we wait till they are gone and then miss them and lament, and cry “I wish I had shown them how much I loved them!”

posted by ken on March 31, 2005 08:49 PM

I would agree with Dana above. Each case, to some extent, is different from another. My dad died of cancer a bit over 3 years ago. He died at home, as he knew (or was told) there was nothing more the hospital could do for him in the way of treatment, and did not want to prolong what he considered inevitable. Someone else might want to fight for every last second of life. But it would seem regardless of what the *survivors* might want or their hopes and fears regarding an outcome, the best way for an individual to let their loved ones (and medical personnel) know what their wishes are, is to get it in writing, be it a living will or a living trust.

As for you and your brother-in-laws brother, I wish there was a simple one size fits all answer. I do know such things (living wills/trusts) can be tailored to your exact needs and wants, and of course they can be updated as family situations and life changes. May you find a solution which fits your needs and wants the best.

posted by Guy S on April 1, 2005 02:06 AM

Perhaps the reason this is so very hard to address is because we love the injured party and because of that very love we want to see them recover and live out the rest of there time in a healthy happy manner. Sadly we often don`t get our preferences .I`m not sure there is one answer or one solution to this problem only that as long as someone loves someone there will always be hope and as long a someone loves someone there will be a desire for a brighter tomorrow. I pray I am never placed in this situation so if you love someone please get a living will and save them the grief of having to decide in front of a world wide media circus.

posted by arathorn on April 1, 2005 07:37 AM

Give me a giant shot of Versed, leave me alone, I will die by myself and fuck you do gooders! Push me in a bar ditch

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